The NFL Pro Bowl - Why?

Every year, my favorite sport goes through the motions of a pretense so horrible that it I go out of my way to avoid it. I'm speaking, of course, about the NFL Pro Bowl.

For the uninitiated, the Pro Bowl is a game played but once a year which features an amalgamation of the "best" NFL players in the league. Analogous to baseball's All-Star Game, the general idea is to gather these players together to both showcase their talent and allow fans the opportunity to see leading competitors face off who otherwise may not meet during the normal course of a season. In NFL culture, being selected as a Pro Bowl participant is not only considered an honor, it can be included in contracts as pay-escalators. Fans, players, coaches and pundits regularly espouse the love for this tradition and the heated debates it inspires over who should (and should not have been) included.

I, on the other hand, absolutely hate it, and here's why.

First and foremost, the game is utterly meaningless
As fans, we already suffer the indignity of being forced to endure four weeks of pre-season nonsense. While the Pro Bowl is just as meaningless, the pre-season has the benefits of:

1. being the first football we've seen in 7 months, therefore sating our built-up hunger for the game
2. giving us the first chance to see newly drafted rookies, new coaches and freshly-traded players in action
3. a degree of meaning for second- and third-string players trying to earn a roster spot

By contrast, the Pro Bowl has absolutely no inherent value.

The players don't treat it like a real game
The effect of the game's pointlessness is profound and clearly evident - the players don't want to risk getting hurt, so they don't play at their full level. Yet, it was (in theory) their on-field performance that got them into the game in the first place. The NFL is unique in this regard, compared to the other leagues: baseball and basketball have a much lower risk of injury, so the games are closer to the real thing.

Player selection is 100% subjective
The most vocal criticism I see of the game is the process by which players are chosen to participate. The league sends out a questionnaire to players and coaches, and it sets-up an online poll on the NFL website. While seemingly democratic, this process introduces a high degree of bias within the results - several players have admitted that popularity, politics and likeably are huge factors in their voting. Additionally, players themselves aren't paying full attention to the weekly performances of the other 1800 or so players in the league - when confronted with "who should I vote for X position?" a player can be just as likely to choose a name they've heard of rather than someone they truly believe deserves the selection.

As far as fan voting, I'll let the NFL website speak for me:

"To ensure your favorite players make it to the Pro Bowl, please feel free to vote as many times as you would like."

There you have it: sanctioned ballot stuffing.

The selected players don't always play
Never has this situation been worse than for this season, by the simple virtue that the Pro Bowl is now before the Super Bowl. According to the NFL, as of today 31 of the 87 players selected have been replaced with alternates. That's 35% of the original roster, including the top quarterbacks Manning, Brees, Brady, and Favre. But don't worry - you'll still get to see Philadelphia Long Snapper Jon Dorenbos in action!

Pro Bowl? Not for me, thanks.